Sunday, 19 February 2023

Never Before!

 This has never happened to me before.....


Ok this may not mean much to others, but to me it is priceless. Usually I am happy if I can keep my inbox below 20, and most of the time I struggle with that. To get it in single figures is considered quite and achievement, but to get it to zero? Unheard of and simply awesome!

Now this doesn't mean that I have nothing to do. Below is another screenshot, this time of my To-Do list summary:


As you can see, currently I have 76 outstanding projects either I or someone I have delegated them to are working on. But the fact they are in here instead of my inbox means that I have actioned them and moved them along. When they are just in the inbox it generally means they are awaiting a response or an action. I am proud to say that whereas in the past I might have sat on emails for months on end, now I am moving on them quickly. That is partly because I have more people to delegate to now, and partly due to the size of my job necessitating swifter responses and action.

So why the change? Well, I have been moving towards a better task management system for years now. Yes, literally years. I have procrastinated, dabbled in numerous offerings (including the one I use now), but never felt satisfied. Then I realised that there truly is no promised land of productivity tools - one has to make something work for one. I was getting frustrated as I had so much on my plate, and I needed to act. Initially I also had to-do lists on the side of my timesheet spreadsheet, which is kind of my personal bible - I use it daily. But I found myself referring to the to-do aspect of this less and less, and the Microsoft To Do app more and more. So there I was and there we are.

I am happy that this is a part of my professional and personal life that I have improved in the last 12 months. I consider this to be quite an achievement.


Sunday, 12 February 2023

My Career - Part 9 - Consulting, Contracting & Flitting Around (2012 - 2018)

This period of life was somewhat tumultuous! When I elected to leave Penjom in early 2012, I thought I had it all under control. I knew the writing was on the wall for Penjom, mainly as the new owners had their own plans and people to execute them. Bob and I had prepared a fleet replacement plan just as the sale was occurring, and that was accepted, which was great. However, Stu, Brian and I had also spent YEARS studying the orebody and coming up with a life of mine plan that would maximise the profitable extraction of the resource. The cornerstone of this was a major west wall cutback. It would mean two years of negative cashflow, but would realise well over 500,000 ounces of gold in the longer term. Alas, the new owners either didn't trust our plan, or didn't want that cashflow strategy, so they elected to abandon it. I believe in the fullness of time - years after I left - they attempted a half-arsed west wall cutback, but ultimately abandoned it. Anyway, that's a story for another post (probably the Penjom one!) But this, as well as the general cultural shift we were experiencing, led me to call time at Penjom.

The ultimate catalyst was that Dean, my friend and old GM at Penjom, had recently become COO for a nickel company called ENK in the Philippines, and needed someone to lead the charge in development of the mining operation. My wife was due to give birth in two months, but hey, it was exactly the opportunity I had been hoping for, and despite the 2:1 roster, off I went...

ENK (European Nickel PLC) - The Philippines

The Philippines. What a place. The ENK office was in Makati, which is kind of an expat/business central suburb in Manila that is essentially restricted access for the safety of those within. I guess it did do that job, although I am sure anyone who really did want to get into Makati, could do so. I started after a three day interview/visit, towards the end of Feb 2012. The ENK project was about a half-day drive away from Manila, past Subic (and old American WW2 naval base) and then up into the hills. There was a small plant up there, mainly doing trials, as this was a nickel laterite - the kind that Murrin used concentrated acid and high-pressure autoclaves to extract. In all honesty, I can't remember how ENK planned to extract the nickel, but they did have a process, and a proprietary one at that I believe.


The photo above shows a road being cut to access part of the mine. The deposit was up in the hills / mountains, and because of the shitty road, a good hours drive uphill. When one went to site, one generally stayed up there, which I did during my brief stint. I didn't really ever get stuck into the mining side of things, because here's the kicker - I only lasted two weeks. After one stint I knew it wasn't going to work. On the one hand, it was some of the stories Dean told of mining contractors coming to meetings carrying handguns (yes they have an American-style gun culture there), and on the other it was the sheer scale of what needed to be done. Forget the mining - the big issue was dealing with drainage and making sure sulphide-laden mud didn't wash into the streams at the foot of these hills that several villages relied on. It was a huge task, and frankly not really my forte. There was a surveyor on site who could help, and I did put together an initial earthworks plan to get started. But my assessment was that it was not really going to work, if we wanted to do it to western standards. After a stint up there, my confidence was quite shaken, and I was really not sure if I could deliver what was needed. I had simply not even had a chance to consider the mining, which was quite a simple aspect of the project, so I was already wavering at this time. I guess this was the first time I was faced with a challenge I wasn't really up for. I mean I was very grateful to Dean for the opportunity, and I am sure it would have eventually led to some interesting work. But I just wasn't the right guy for the job.

Mid-note: I'd call this a footnote, but I am not done yet, so mid-note it is. Interestingly, within six months of me pulling the pin, the project was bought out by local partners and turned into an "Asian mining" project. No offense to my Asian family, friends and colleagues, but you all know what I mean. Rip, tear and bust mining. And NO need for expats. So whilst I missed out on the redundancy payout, I made the right call. I did disappoint Dean in my first-yes-then-no performance, but we got over that quickly enough.

Subic was a place we stopped at on the way to site, and a place I really found very interesting. It had been a US Navy base since WW2 days, although when I was there, the US were not present (I believe they have since gone back). It was coastal, laid back, and a party town. I only visited twice, but enjoyed it. Photo below.


The second visit to Subic was one of the things that made my mind up about the Philippines. The bar/resto/hotel we had breakfast at on our road trips had a recent terrible story. A disgruntled sacked former employee returned to the place one morning, pulled a gun and shot dead the Australian owner for wronging him. This stuff happens here. Not. For. Me.

ASN Round #1 - Malaysia

So after a meeting with John at the Ritz Carlton in KL (which I remember because the lunch buffet probably cost $100, but being vegan, John ate only sliced carrots and nuts, which to me was nuts!), he offered me a contract to help with the quarry side of his new venture. ASN Cement was a privately-owned Singaporean company, but owned by Aussies, with a view to building what would have been the largest cement plant in the world at that time. John knew me initially from my Cement Australia days (so he knew I knew limestone quarrying) and then JMS, where he was the CEO when I joined them (he actually contacted me to get me there too, so despite some issues which we will cover in due course, John actually did pretty well for me overall throughout my career).

The plan was to build the plant at a site near Gua Musang, in Kelantan, not all that far from my old haunt of Penjom at Kuala Lipis. Although the site itself was actually at a locality called Merapoh, which was in Pahang (same as Penjom). So I was familiar with the area, and happy to do the drives up to site to direct drilling, sampling and site planning activities. 

This went on for a good few months, including a visit by a China-based company called Sinoma, who were interested in both part-ownership and designing the plant. That was an interesting day, with a whole lot of kow-towing to the China exec's, who didn't really bring much to the table IMHO, but certainly acted like they did.

Anyway, it all didn't matter, because late in 2012, the following happened:

Dear all,
Kindly find below article on Star Newspaper for your reading.
 
Published: Saturday November 16, 2012 MYT 12:00:00 AM                 
                         

No cement plant project in Merapoh

by isabelle lai

 
 
 
 

PETALING JAYA: The Pahang state government has promised that there will be no cement production plant at Merapoh.

Instead it is planning to convert the area to an ecotourism destination.

Pahang Tourism and Culture Committee chairman Datuk Mohd Sharkar Shamsuddin said they were now surveying the size of the area to be gazetted for ecotourism purposes.

“The state exco has opposed the cement plant project. We will come up with a master plan for sustainable development in Merapoh.

“So people don’t have to worry anymore and can sleep well,” he told The Star, referring to the concerns raised by environmentalists over the proposed cement plant project.

The land was held by Bintang Tower, while the cement manufacturing license was held by Lipis Cement since 1997 although the project never took off.

Concerns over the project’s revival arose when Singapore-based company, ASN Cement, expressed interest in restarting the project in late 2011.

Mohd Sharkar said he would enlist the expertise of the Malaysian Nature Society (MNS) as well as other relevant organisations to help with the master plan.

He said their input was important as the state government wanted to ensure that development there was carried out properly.

“It is also important for me to know the dos and don’ts regarding the environment. I will ask experts to look into cave and orchid conservation at Merapoh as well,” he said.

Mohd Sharkar said the state government would also propose to Keretapi Tanah Melayu Bhd that it upgrade its train station there, as it planned for tourists to travel by rail to Merapoh.

“We are not just doing this for ecotourism, but to preserve the ecosystem of Malaysia itself. We want to ensure our water catchment areas are not harmed,” he said.

MNS president Prof Dr Maketab Mohamed praised the state government’s rejection of the cement plant project.

“We are very happy. This shows the state government is serious about conservation and using ecotourism as a means of generating income,” he said, adding that Sabah was a good example to follow.

Maketab said MNS would be glad to lend its help in developing the master plan before any work began.

So fortunately, ASN had a Plan B, at a locality called Chiku, further to the north. But it meant going back to the drawing board, limiting spending in the meantime, and no work for me for at least a while. So I had to find more work. Next stop, Queensland!

Alcyone - Texas, Queensland

What a clusterfuck this was. Look, the deposit was probably workable, but when under the charge of a megalomaniac, table-thumping narcissist, it had no chance. There was NO mining engineering, and no exploration geology done. Yes a little grade control was carried out and yes someone had put a pit shell around it and done a life-of-mine schedule, but neither of those things were going to save this place. I should have picked it. Alas this was the first of a couple of decisions where I let my circumstances override my logical brain. We needed a job - I got a job, paying decent money, and promising the world - so I signed up, and lo-and-behold, it was a fuck-up.


I lasted six months, and left under cover of darkness. I did give sufficient notice, but wanted to leave on my terms. Seriously, if you knew the guy who was my boss there, you would understand why. Within a few months of me leaving, the site went into care and maintenance, and shortly after the company folded. I made the right call again, although this time did a fair bit of cash on foolishly bought shares. Foolish because I believe the CEO-hype, who was delusion, and frankly a liar to the market. That wouldn't be the last time in my career I was faced with such a situation...

ASN Round #2 - Malaysia

So I got my get out of jail free card when John rang me and said they'd secured new ground to explore and a couple of million to keep the project going. We also had a new local partner, as sadly our Dato had passed away in the short time I had been in Australia. So the initial work was to figure out which hills were best to mine. We had a plot to build the plant on, and were literally surrounded by limestone hills. And I'm talking the James Bond whatever that movie was called kind - vertical cliffs. Amazing to look at, but also equally amazing to try and figure out how to develop.


Check out the photo above. Amazing really, and a pity to quarry, but despite what the media say, these things are plentiful. Plus look at what they do to the rest of the landscape. They bulk strip forest everywhere in this country, and no fucker blinks an eye. They even log in protected forest and national parks because they are so corrupt, yet when a foreign company wants to quarry one hill, they suddenly become environmentally conscious. Utter hypocritical bullshit. Anyway, fortunately for me I didn't have to worry too much about that. My job was to figure out how much and how good the resource was, come up with a way to develop it, and put all this together in a plan. I got this kicked off, but as normal, things were going slow. Luckily for me, old mate Dean rang up asking if I could help him for a few months. ASN didn't need a lot in the meantime, and this was super coin, so why not. Off to Wetar Island for me for a few months...

Finders - Indonesia

Now, this was one to remember. Not long after coming back from the Texas debacle, Dean asked me if I wanted some consulting work. I had come back for ASN, but it was taking them time to gain traction, and the timing for this job was perfect. The only drawback? It was a 4:2 roster, FIFO from Wetar Island, in the Maluku Province of Eastern Indonesia. Dean was GM for the project for Finders Resources. They were re-starting the demonstration plant that had been mothballed, and bringing the mine out of care and maintenance, back into production. The problem was that the mine management team had also been in C&M for a number of years, and getting them re-motivated proved to be a major challenge. One of the expats - who shall remain unnamed - had also been there through much of this period, and had kind of gone "native". I think Dean ended up moving him on as he was being more nonconstructive than anything else.


Wetar was a true hardship posting. The photo is outside Dean's little hut, right on the beach. It was idyllic, laid back and ok. Getting there and back however, was something else. Kupang, as I'll write about elsewhere (who would have thought I would end up living there for God's sake!) was really an outpost in the far east of Indo, and very under-developed compared to elsewhere. Highly unreliable electricity, internet, phone signal, food and drink, wow it was tough sometimes. But getting to Kupang was only the beginning. Either the same day or the next morning, I'd jump in a car and drive eight hours to the east of West Timor, to then jump in a fishing boat and chug along for 8-12 hours to get to Wetar. The longest boat trip I had was 28 hours. Yes you read that right. Towards the end of my stay they got a better boat, which then left from Kupang directly. But it was still a 10 hour ride and the worst part of the whole thing.

Then there was the connectivity. It was ok during the day when I was in the office. But at night, internet was next to non-existent, and there was no mobile signal on Wetar at all. Only one shop, so I subsisted on IndoMee and a few snacks for weeks at a time. The food was ok, but only ok, so it was a tough posting for me. I would never have taken it on full-time. Of course that was never on the cards anyway, because B-doi had only just been born, so wifey was back in KL with 2 under 2 in her care. Her parents were around, as was Jassie, but I needed to be home.

The work on Wetar was doing some scheduling, helping them develop some basic mine planning, and coming up with initial drill & blast designs. The only software was Surpac, which I am familiar with, but it had been a long time since I had used it. I was able to throw together some reasonable work for the board, and develop a weekly planning system, together with getting some blasts on the ground. Frankly though, in these kinds of environments, one needs to be somewhere 3-6 months to get truly established. I was there only 3, so my impact was limited. Still, I think I did help, and it was good experience for me, as well as good remuneration.

ASN Round #3 - Malaysia

This is where I did the lion's share of my work for these guys. It went from pretty much April 2014 (after I left Wetae) to early 2016. I did do a little more work in 2016 before we left Malaysia in June, but not much - and I never got paid for it either.

That was the real downside to ASN. I mean, the rate JR put me on was very cool, $1,300 per day, pro-rated. So some very busy months I made good coin. Yes the flip side of that was that we were living in an expensive place in KL, and renting a car, etc, etc. But we had some wonderful holidays, a great lifestyle, and I regret none of it.

So from when I finished with Finders in Q2 2014, to when things dried up, I was a busy boy. After our initial hiatus, we had found a new location to build the plant, at Chiku, just a bit further up the road than before, and this time into Kelantan, a more Malay and conservative place than either KL or Pahang. It was interesting. We did some good drilling, I got Brian to do a block model for me, I put together a fleet purchase plan, and a life of mine schedule and cashflow. What really killed ASN though, was Najib. Najib the Prime Minister, I hear you ask? Yes, him. He, and his stupid corrupt ham-fisted handling of the 1MDB investment group, that saw him siphon off over $1 billion to his personal accounts (how fucking stupid can you get?). Anyway, I write this as my own opinion, but I believe it is close to the truth. In any event, our western investors got cold feet about a $500 million project in such a place, and pulled out. Panic stations. We then started more heavy negotiations with Chinese mobs, but of course, smelling blood, they wanted control and a lion's share of the business. JR wasn't having that, so we hit a stalemate, suddenly had no cash, and ground to a halt.

The silly thing is that in that time, we had actually got our quarry license granted, despite what the greenies were trying in the press:

https://www.thestar.com.my/lifestyle/living/2015/07/13/quarrying-threatens-to-flatten-this-wildlife-refuge-in-kelantan

I really hate the media, with a passion. 

So, this was early 2016 by this stage. I was compelled to help with site visits, interviews, and preparing more technical information, but started to get the shits after not being paid for a few months. By the time we eventually left Malaysia in June, ASN owed me $60k. They still owe me $60k. JR still claims he is on the verge of signing term sheets with new investors, but frankly I think he is a lying, self-deluding fuck now. Hey if it ever happens, then sweet, I would likely go back as Manager. However I think it is now very unlikely. A pity, as it is a world-class deposit and project.

Barooga - NSW

This is an interesting part of the post to write. Far out. Look, I am grateful that this opportunity was there, at this time. Frankly, without it we might have been in a bit of trouble. But then again, perhaps I would have just had to do some hard yards doing FIFO or something.

No. Screw that. Regardless of how things ended up, I am grateful for this period of my life for a number of reasons. One, I needed a job, and without one in Malaysia, we needed to move back to Australia. Two, this gave us the best part of two years close to my family, and gave us all an opportunity to be close to Mum and V. Great for all of us, but especially for my kids. Lastly, Three, spending that time in the shop was good for my fitness - both mental and physical. I ended up hating it, and my initial evaluation of the business ended up being correct - too big a risk. V&P did well for a while, but small business in rural areas, when competing with the likes of Woolies, is almost completely destined to fail. And fail we did, eventually. We're still paying it off too, but not for much longer.

Fuck a duck, that's one heck of a post. I possibly should have broken it up into component parts, but it does fit the bill, as in all this together represented a key chapter in my career - one where I was making good money, then making no money, having plenty of work, then none, and all the while being stressed and wondering where my next stable job was going to come from. It was not for lack of trying, as I had hoped first ENK, then ASN, then Alcyone, then ASN again would provide that longevity. Hey, I was even willing to commit to the shop long-term, as long as we could survive. But ultimately, either they didn't work for me, or I didn't work for them. Whichever way you look at it (generally the former I feel), this nomadic lifestyle had a use-by date, and frankly I was glad when it came to an end. If you look at my LinkedIn profile, you'll notice my "consultancy" days go until late 2019, but that's only because post-Gulf, while we were in Malaysia, I was open to such opportunities, and even courted a few potential contract options, but to no avail. Where I am now fits the bill better than anything has for a long, long time.

So, Feb 2012 until Mar 2018 comprised my consulting / contracting years. Interesting that for such an unpredictable and difficult period, it actually comprised the longest part of my career to date. Maybe that says something about me, I don't know. Probably not really, as you can see by the post that a whole lot of different stuff, in different places, was going on during this time. Plus we were really hoping that at least a couple of these period were going to evolve into something more permanent. It just never happened. But I don't regret it. Some great memories, some great parts of my life in terms of lifestyle and moments with my family. Frankly, I was damn lucky during these years, and I am glad for these experiences.

Well, do I?

 I'm not much for motivational videos, self-help books, that kind of thing. I have always been my own man and I figure out my problems for myself. That said, I hardly slept at all last night, because I am grappling with a decision at the moment.

Steve Jobs once asked himself - "do I love what I do? If I knew today was my last day, would I be happy with what I am about to do?" Not an easy answer. To be frank no job would be part of my itinerary if I knew today was my last day. So maybe it's just another smear of self-help bullshit. Or maybe not. No, it is bullshit. What matters is making the most of your time. In this world, if you want free time (in my case that reads "retirement") then you need money. If you're still raising kids like me and want to live a decent life, that means lots of money.

I had a few beers last night and messaged Monster, telling him I was thinking about putting my hand up for Vietnam again. His response was that he is wearing himself out and needs help. He wants to know if I intend to make the plunge. Now I need to tell him something.

WTF am I going to do? Unlike a job ad, Monster has essentially handed me a contract, and a damn good offer. The risks? Will I get a work permit? Is the company secure enough for the long term? Is the world going to turn to shit anytime soon? Am I going to regret leaving Mawsons?

So the question really is, do I love what I do?

I think the answer is yes, but with a healthy dose of lifestyle, savings and a feeling that I am making the most of my life at the same time. I honestly doubt I can accomplish all that in Australia, well at Mawsons anyway. In a SEA expat role, life would be interesting and fun, I'd be making good money, and therefore I would be enjoying what I do. So the answer is you can't love what you do in isolation, it has to make sense in the bigger picture of your life.



Sunday, 5 February 2023

Why do I keep doing this?

Why I am applying for jobs? Yes, late last year I was reaching breaking point, and was very stressed. Yes, I have been with Mawsons for coming onto four years now, which is a long time for me. Yes, I miss Asia and the lifestyle there. Yes I do suffer from a lack of confidence sometimes at work, but only sometimes.

The facts remain - being a GM is my dream job. I have almost 50 sites / work groups to look after, with a turnover of ~$200 million, 250 people to look after, and so much freedom here. Yes my boss can be a bit micro-managing, and yes I do lack quarry plant knowledge, but overall I think my contributions are highly valued, especially what I have done to design our new Quarry Division structure. I have achieved a lot, and despite the challenges of the past year, I think I essentially have a job for life here.

So why do I want to leave? The recent NZ job, which I just turned down, is a good example. Yes it would be lesser stress, but it would introduce a whole lot of new unknowns. Plus it would be doing so, as well as uprooting the family, for no extra reward. Remember what the endgame is here - retirement. At this stage, I don't see me retiring until I am 60+. I may as well stick with the good wicket I am on unless an option comes up that could potentially bring that forward.

So, as the photo at the beginning illustrates - the grass is not always greener, it's just that we think it is.

This could be the end of the post. But there is something outstanding here to consider - Vietnam. The offer Monster put on the table - and it was a signed contract offer - was 2.5x my current salary. Plus free housing and no doubt cheaper living. Yes, massive uproot of family, but not to entirely unfamiliar territory. The thing is, I said no to old mate last time. To my knowledge they have never really filled that role (he was doing it himself last time we spoke). So if I am ever to go back to him, I have to be ready to say yes, quit Mawsons, and move the whole family to Vietnam. SE Asia expat role? Tick. Expat package? Tick. SEA lifestyle? Tick. Childhood experience covering both their Australian and Asian heritage for my kids? Tick.

The crosses are for; not home as much (likely 3 nights away per week); unknown security of company (FFS let's not go there again, but Monster says these guys are secure. I trust him); uprooting secure family footing that I spent the last 10 years saying I wanted; likely missing out on Ma's last few years, both for us and the kids.

So pros and cons, pros and cons. I need to decide what I am prepared to do before I go back to Monster. The thing is, I'm really not sure.

A Rethink

This is a post by Tim May (ex-Aussie cricketer and part of the old school brigade)" 

"About 20 months ago, I made a decision at the commencement of the pandemic to quit alcohol. I certainly wasn’t an habitual drinker but would definitely go overboard from time to time. I found myself becoming more reclusive, moody and depressed. After being diagnosed with a leaking aortic valve in my heart and a scary incident with alcohol, I decided enough was enough. I booked myself into rehab!

The 30 days I spent there was eye-opening for me. I bought into the program 100% and since then have never had an urge to drink.
As part of the program, I was required to go to AA meetings for 90 consecutive days. I will never forget my first meeting when a guy who had been sober for 7 years said that since he gave up alcohol he has found true happiness – the rest of the group all agreed. I thought they were full of shit. I had so much fun drinking, and drinking gave me the confidence that I lacked naturally.
I am here today to say they were not full of shit – I have never been happier, never felt so confident and never felt so clear in thought. And my golf game is about 10 shots better. It’s the most important thing I have done in my life.
I know that not all addictive people have found it as easy as me to kick their habit. I am extremely fortunate to have a wonderful family to support me, not too many worries in life and am at an age where my mates are all scaling down their Saturday nights."

Wow, that is something. For some time now, not always but often enough, I have known that drinking was impacting my life. Yes I was still functioning, and yes I was mostly a decent person, but so often my day was geared towards when I could crack a can.


The photo above is me and a couple of good mates - both working and drinking mates, at about 8am at KLIA on our way to a convention in Bali. We quickly abandoned the convention and spent the rest of the trip drinking. It was a lot of fun, but boy I paid for it - liver pains, days long hangovers, etc. That was December 2010, over 12 years ago. All that has changed is that I have slowed down due to health and age. Yes I drink mid-strength or light beers almost exclusively now, but still, I drink a good six days per week on average, and ~10 cans per day when I do. It's simply too much.

Then, there is the family heritage aspect. Many of my previous generations family members have died from alcohol-related illness and disease. Alcoholism is not a stranger to the Brown family. No, I am not drinking metho like poor old Uncle Harold, nor having pints of beer with double-double whisky chasers at 9am like Uncle Ted, but still, the booze is too big a part of my life.

The thing is, I don't want to give it up as I enjoy it. Looking at Tim May's words, perhaps I need to give myself the chance to experience life without it and see just how good that can be. Today marks Day #4 of no booze since coming back home from NSW earlier in the week. I am going to do tomorrow too at least, but then I'm off to Broken Hill for work, which will likely involve beers again. Wifey is also keen on cutting down a lot, which helps, as we both struggle a bit with this issue (me more so of course though). I do enjoy the clarity of mind, and the apparent increase amount of time available to do things. 

So, this remains an ongoing issue and somewhat of a struggle. I am not yet ready to give it away completely, but I do recognise that I need to take back control, and consume less alcohol. No question about that. I am committed to doing so.

YouTube - Revisited

So it has been almost five years since I did my first YT post, reflecting on what I was watching at the time. Then, in mid-2020, YT as my ma...