It has been a hard slog to 51 though.
Sitting at my desk this morning, having enjoyed breakfast birthday cake with my family - they all pitched in and made a mango sponge cake, reminiscent of those we used to get at Sungai Pelek in the interim period before Mawsons.
That doesn't mean that I am depressed - far from it. I am just not always in control it seems. Buying this new house, I am hoping, will provide me with the need to have everything in control, and planned out properly. When I'm in that kind of situation I often respond well to it, and I am confident I will this time too. I need to make this work - for my own sanity of course, but mainly for my family. Who knows how much longer I have. Don't get me wrong, I don't think my demise is imminent, nor even in the near future. But my goal in life is to set up my kids for as easy a start as possible into life, and for my wife to not have to worry about her own needs once I am gone. I am getting there, although I fucking wish it could be three steps forward full stop, instead of three forward, and one or two back, which seems to be my default approach to life.
2024 has kicked off with some really positive things on the horizon, but also a few clear challenges. I am trying to lose weight, trying to increase positive habits in my life, and trying to be more proactive and progressive in my work. Let's hope I can keep up the good start I have had (albeit tempered by a couple of set-backs), and stay positive.
