Tony Robbins - Rules For Life

Or something like that. Hey, believe me, I am a self-confessed, self-help hater - I think the industry preys on the weak and confused, and frankly just dribbles utter shit most of the time. A lot of these figures - Tony Robbins included to a degree - come across as kind of cult leaders, and the kinds of people who jump on the bandwagon all too easily just irritate me.

But the other day (long time ago now, as this has been in drafts for ages), I watched a video on Joe Rogan's channel - a YouTube short where he was discussing some of the key things people should focus on. From memory he said there were about 12, but he picked these three. I took notes on them as below:

It resonated with me for a number of reasons. Focus on what you have, not what you don't have. I think this is really solid advice. I have a lovely family, a high-paying job, a great house, and the opportunity for what I have always wanted - stability for us all. If I focus on that, and making the most of these things, and this time, it makes the "now" a better place to be. Rather than focussing too much on what I don't have, which is enough money to retire, a seaside home in SEA, ready access to pork noodle and NL (no I'm not kidding). Is it reasonable for me to expect that I can achieve all those in fairly short order? Well, no not really. So why do it. Focus on what you do have, focus on now. Be grateful.

The second reason was to ask what is your focus in terms of your control. Do you focus on what you can or can't control? Tony says that if too much focus is on what you can't control, that will breed negative feelings. I think he's right. In terms of my control, I can control what I put in my body. I can control what comes out of my mouth. I can control my actions. I can control the best use of my income, to both give us a quality of life, and to build for a future. I can't try to live like I'm trying to create a future that may or may not happen. Buying shitloads of Lotto tickets for instance, has proven to be a waste of my money. Yes you have to be in it to win it, but at those odds, go very light in terms of spend, let Lady Luck take care of itself, and focus more on providing for the now. Maybe save for a holiday, for instance?

The last one, was what do you spend most of your time thinking about - the past, the present or the future. Frankly, I spend most of my time either in the past or in the future. Not enough in the here and now. It occurs to me often enough, that my kids are in their prime, at least in terms of their desire to hang out with their dad. When they become teens, this will become less likely, as it is for almost all kids. Plus the other important people in my life are here now - my wife and my mother chief amongst them. Yes it is nice to have fond memories of days of yore. It is also nice to imagine being retired and not having to work. But I am in neither of those places. I am here, I am now, and my family wants me to be present with them. I need to focus more on doing that. More activities on weekends, more time spent playing Lego, more time being hubby and dada.

So, despite the fact that I saw online recently that Tony's company is ripping off the cult followers who pay thousands to go to his shows, his words do ring true. He also said that before you can look after your mind, first look after your body. That is another truism, and I am well aware of the impact of poor health on everything else. I think maybe I should buy a bike? Definitely start to look for those bush walks more now that it is cooling off. More metal detecting trips too methinks. 

Be here Dave.