Digital Nomad - Can I Do It?

Gosh, reading about this kind of lifestyle makes me think. I would frigging love to be able to not have to answer to anyone, in an employment sense. Would I have the self-discipline to make it work though? Replacing my kind of income by digital income would not be easy. Hard to do when needing to support a family of 5. But imagine being able to work for oneself? 

I do love writing... Freelance journalism. Travel writing, reviews, musings, there are numerous things I could write about. The key here, is to actually have a crack at it, and see how it goes. I have thought about making videos, but in order to do so, I need to put a door on my office. I probably also need a mental reset, as I am too easily distracted as it stands. 

I guess the first thing to do is find somewhere that accepts offerings from freelancers, and write on something. Hmm, scratch that. I just spent some time researching freelance writing, and I'm just not ready for it. I am far better off working on making my blog better, and going from there. The other thing to do would be to try my hand at a few videos - I speak well, articulate myself well, and have had an interesting life. Perhaps I could try some vlogs - putting together a video going through trip photos for instance, and narrating the journey. I like the sound of that, as it also works towards my legacy goal of leaving something behind of me, for my children. Let's put that in the to-do list and see where we go with it.

Where To From Here?

Hi boss,

I have been sitting on this email for a while, but I think it’s time to share it with you. It’s fair to say that my performance as Quarries GM has not been at its best for the last few months, perhaps even the last six. There are numerous reasons for that, which I will briefly explain below. The question that will come out of this however, is where to from here? But to begin with, there are three main contributing factors as I see them;

 1. My personal life – I have had a tough period of time, firstly with my ongoing health concerns, which have been quite up and down in the last quarter, and secondly with my home life. I was having a pretty difficult period there for a while. I believe it has settled down now, but it still requires a lot of my attention to ensure harmony is maintained. I know this probably all sounds fairly vague, but that’s the most detail I can offer.

2. My relationship with you – One of the main reasons this is being written instead of expressed verbally, is that I still find you quite intimidating boss. In all honesty, I tend to avoid you, although I do make a point of ensuring regular catch-ups, as I know this is critical. I am also aware, as I have mentioned to you in the past, that those regular catch-ups do often help my frame of mind. But I feel like you don’t really manage me, instead, you manage situations around me. Thus I end up not really knowing where I stand, and uncertain as to where my role ends and yours begins. I don’t feel like I have direction or feedback, and this makes me feel lost sometimes. Oddly enough, I am reluctant to ask for more direct management, as in all honesty, I am not sure if that would make things better or worse. I do feel that you tend to micromanage situations, and that many of your decisions are based on feelings at the time, and are thus not always predictable or consistent. Maybe I have that wrong, but that’s how I see it. I do recognise and acknowledge my own fault in managing this relationship more effectively too. 

3. My own job satisfaction – The description of my feelings in Point #2 are nothing new. Most of this has been around throughout my time at the company. However, I have successfully been able to manage with how things work for most of that time (with a few stressful periods thrown in of course). I have been able to do so because I have been thoroughly invested in my job, and enjoying the numerous challenges that have been thrown at me. Frankly, I find that I am no longer enjoying it. I am bored with many aspects of my role (for example, the impending budget process) and feel like I am not really part of the decision-making process anymore. Nothing gets done or approved unless it is run past you, and thus I feel like a toothless tiger. Honestly, I simply feel like if I ceased to exist, very little would change, and you would be able to continue to manage most of the big-ticket items in quarries just as you have done for the last year or more.  

I feel bad for having to say all this. Firstly, because you do have a lot of very good qualities boss. You are supportive, generous, highly capable & knowledgeable, and very committed. It’s just that I don’t feel like I am in charge of my own area. I feel like a spectator half the time. I have no hard feelings boss, nobody’s perfect, and I don’t profess to be the perfect quarry GM by any means (frankly I know I’m far less than that). It’s quite likely that things require your intervention to ensure good outcomes. It is also quite likely that it is me that is the problem. But I do feel that, more and more, I am becoming superfluous. Due to that, I suspect my time at the company will soon be coming to an end. I could just grin and bear it, job hunt in the background, and resign out of nowhere when the time comes, but I wouldn’t feel right doing that. I am not writing this in the hope that you fix it all, and we go on renewed and with a fresh sense of purpose, like nothing has happened. Is the answer better management of me (by both you and I), is it putting me in a different role, or is it best that I look to move on. I am not sure. But I felt it was important that I communicated where I am at with you, so you are aware of my feelings and situation.

I apologise for dropping this on you out of the blue. I can assure you that the contributing factors that led to this email are not whimsical, nor have they manifested solely in the recent past. I am well aware that I am a flawed human being, and perhaps not the GM that I aspired to be, back in early 2020. What matters to me is my career development and performance, and how well I am able to contribute to the company in the role I am employed in. Currently, I do not feel you are getting value for money out of me, and as such, something needs to change. I don’t presume to know all the answers, I just know enough to put this on the table for discussion. I look forward to talking with you on this topic soon.

Regards,

Dave

That is an email I recently wrote to my boss. I didn't end up sending it though. Advice I received made me do it in person instead, which was a good move. However, I wanted to save this for posterity, and for something for me to reflect on in future. The discussion went well, as it often does. However, the proof will be in the pudding. I don't just need more phone calls, I need to be managed, have goals set, and given a framework for me to work within. I realise this is a double-edged sword though, as the lack of management of me also gives me a whole lot of freedom, that I do very much enjoy. So we'll see how it goes.

 

Leadership of Self

This is an interesting one. Some time ago I posted about my own (ongoing) struggles, and the inspiration I had found in checklists, particularly those focussed around positive behaviours, good habits etc. I had print-outs, draft posts, notes in my book, to-do list prompts, you name it. But it has taken me until this week to actually get the damn values book put together, and in use. I ummed and ahhed about the contents - what values will I track? Eventually I just bit the bullet and put a list of 25 items together - 10 goals, 5 values, and 10 habits, for me to track. If nothing else, it has prompted me to check my blood sugar today, for the first time in an age. So I call that progress.

Much like Bhavna's post that inspired me to begin with, I put my initial checklist together in an A4 spiral notebook. My list ended up significantly different to hers, with hers having much more emphasis on work and health, and not including weekends. For me, making good use of my weekends is just as important, and my self-control and self-love journey requires a lot more emphasis than just work. Here is my first week below:

So far, so good. I think I need to flesh out what deep work means a bit more, as I do with my Top 3. I probably need to define them both, and actually measure against that definition. I think the concept of making deep work phone/email/distraction-free, is utterly crucial, and I know it would be beneficial to me. Thinking back to when I have needed to just get something done, I have put those distractions aside, and made tremendous progress - and that is only perhaps for an hour or two. It truly is something worth pursuing. 

As for family and others close to me, it is useful to keep track of time spent. It doesn't need to be quantified, it just needs to mean that I gave each of them some time, showed interest in their lives, and demonstrated that I am there for them. As with much of the rest of this, we'll see how this goes over time, and refine it if needs be.

With habits, that's fairly self-explanatory too. I put music in because I know the impact it has on my mental health. I also put water in for health reasons, although I am pretty sure I drink enough. I may change that to water plants at some point, as I am finding that I am enjoying having my plants, and caring for them. It's just that I get distracted, and sometimes don't water them often enough. I want to make that a positive habit I adopt.

Probably the hardest section to fill in is values. I love the idea of them, and am fully committed to making adhering to these values core to my being. I understand courage, kindness and patience. I think I understand respect well enough to know when I am being respectful, or otherwise. Gratitude is not so easy though. I think it is vital that I recognise how good I have it in life, and also teach that to my children, so it needs to be on the list. Actually living the value though? Hmm, that may take practice. Another value I could include is something along the lines of self-love. No, not that kind, I mean not hating oneself, or admonishing oneself, as I tend to do sometimes. Anyway, for Week #1, I am happy enough, and will continue with this for now. I'll certainly give it a good month, and then review again from there.

The last thing I wanted to mention was that I finally got back to Fuzion this week, which is where I began this post, whilst waiting for a breakfast meeting with one of my reports. I really need to get back into the habit of doing this weekly. Having that space, and that dedicated time for doing some writing, editing, even work, is priceless. I should make another post of exploring Echuca / Moama options when it comes to early morning coffee, breakfast and blogging. I love Fuzion, but the seats are a bit hard, and there are few charging outlets. Not necessarily deal-breakers, but it would be more ideal to have those options. I have tried Essen a few times, and similarly, it is not an ideal workspace. Time to do some research methinks. I will update on both this, and my values / goals / habits journey again soon.

TV Shows Over The Years

So today is cup day, a public holiday here in Vic, and I am home with the kids while wifey is at work (actual post finished and published months later, hey I have been busy!). I was sitting upstairs, trying to find something to watch, and spotted an old favourite on my tablet - The X Files. As it happens, 2024 marks its 30th anniversary since release, amazing! It is the same vintage as my career really. I fondly remember the old days, starting in Hanbury St in Kalgoorlie with my old mate Dave Lowe, watching all these. I even had the I Want To Believe poster for a lot of years. What a classic show. 

So this has prompted me to think about all the classic TV shows of my life. These days, we only watch TV shows on streaming services, largely Prime and Stan right now, with occasional others ones coming in if they don't host the show we want to watch. But before streaming, it was all about sitting on the couch and either tuning in each week, or perhaps buying the seasons box sets and bingeing. I would like to look back and think about the shows I used to love as a kid, and an adult. So let's do this by decade:

1980's

The A Team - lots of fun

Dukes of Hazzard - lots of fun

Knight Rider - pretty cool

Who's The Boss - pretty cool, I was an Alyssa Milano fanboy back in the day

Miami Vice - very cool

The Love Boat - lots of fun

MacGyver - pretty cool

The Golden Girls - lots of fun

Magnum PI - loved this show, classic!

Star Trek TNG - absolute, all-time classic, must watch!

Battlestar Galactica Original - loved this show, classic!

1990's

Star Trek Voyager - loved this show, classic!

Home Improvement - lots of fun

Everybody Loves Raymond - lots of fun

The X Files - absolute, all-time classic, must watch!

Friends - lots of fun

Frasier - loved this show, classic!

Seinfeld - lots of fun

The Simpsons - lots of fun

Red Dwarf - loved this show, classic!

2000's

Big Bang Theory - lots of fun

Scrubs - lots of fun

Parks & Recreation - lots of fun

Buffy The Vampire Slayer - lots of fun

How I Met Your Mother - loved this show, classic!

House - lots of fun

Supernatural - lots of fun

Myth Busters - lots of fun

Lost - lots of fun

Band of Brothers - loved this show, classic!

The IT Crowd - loved this show, classic!

24 - lots of fun

CSI Miami - lots of fun

Battlestar Galactica Reimagined - absolute, all-time classic, must watch!

I won't bother with 2010 and beyond. Originally, I wasn't going to bother with 2020 and beyond, but I could not find a single show in the 2010's that I liked, at least not on the lists that I looked at. It's fair to say that the whole definition of TV shows has changed since the beginning of the 2010's, although episodic entertainment is still very much a thing. There have been a few shows I have watched and enjoyed, like From, but nothing I would venture to call a classic at this point. 

So we have three shows that make the all-time list - TNG, X Files and BSG Reimagined. All are utterly amazing and all have aged very well. Well worth a look if you need some binge watching.

Today's Walk - Melbourne CBD

Day #2 in Melbourne saw a big day of exploration again. We started by taking the footbridge that goes from the 'G to Federation Square, which was a great walk, past the Tennis Centre, and all the activity there, in preparation for the AO next week. From there we opted to go check out South Walk, the mall at Southbank. While it was a nice walk and a cool area, it didn't have much in the way of shopping, which is what the tribe was craving. So from there, we headed across the Yarra again, into the CBD, and up to Melbourne Central. There we shopped 'til we dropped, and I got to sample Marrybrown, the Malaysian fried chicken fast food place that opened here a year ago. It was good too. The maps are split in two again, this time because of a Google Maps limitation, limiting the number of stops one can put in one journey. 

The first map takes us into the centre of town, and the second, around Melb Central, and the walk home. It amounted to well over 14,000 steps this day, which includes a lot of walking around off-street, that is not shown on the maps.

I'm going to call it 10km all-up for this one, as we spent a heap of time wandering around in malls, whereas I just put the main landmarks on the maps. I was spent by the time we got back, not so much in terms of fitness, but my feet hurt. I am not sure if it's me or the shoes. I'll try my new Merrell's next time around, and see how we go. Thrilled to get two big walks in on this trip!

Today's Walk - Jolimont & East Melbourne

So today we arrived in Melbs for our quick visit. Today's walk was in two parts. Firstly, to check out the local 7-11 and hopefully find a bottlo for wifie. We found the 7-11 sure enough, but no bottlo close-by. We were cool with that, as my plan was to order booze and food online. That plan ended in disaster, which I'll talk about in the trip post. So the first walk was as follows:

As the online thing didn't happen, we ended up needing to walk to find dins too. The 7-11 walk didn't yield much fruit in terms of potential dining options, so we opted to walk in the other direction, into the city:

We scratched both itches on this walk, although because we gave dins so long to arrive, it was close to 9pm by the time we got back from dins - a late finish by our usual standards!

So about 5km all-up, although I think it may have been a fair bit more with all our meandering, given that the day amounted to over 13,000 steps. The city walk was to-be-expected, but the local one was a lovely stroll. Plenty of parks and gardens around what is a fairly leafy and quiet suburb. Right next to the MCG too, which is of course why we stayed here. Looking forward to the rest of the trip!

Words of The Day #2

So I have been doing a lot more reading over the festive season. One, because I have set myself the short-term goal of finishing two books in this 30-day period. And Two, because getting back into reading is something that has been on my agenda for bloody years now. In a simpler time, back before too many vices took hold, so we're talking uni and the say 10 years after that, I used to read voraciously. I had Stephen King, Clive Cussler, Richard Laymon, and numerous others, coming out of my ears! I am pleased to be back in the mix, and equally pleased to be increasing my vocabulary again. I consider a strong vocab' to be a personal strength, and remember being complimented as such by a Y10 history teacher at Cobram High, back in the day. 

I also remember that period of time where I had an iPad Mini, and used Apple Books. I read a lot this way, and loved the feature where you could click on a word you didn't understand, and choose to view its definition, right there in the reading app. That is a damn cool feature. Does it mean eBooks are better than the real ones? On its own, definitely not. But eBooks have other benefits. For one, they allow one to live in a bit more of minimalistic manner. That is a plus and something I would benefit from - but for non-holy grail books that is. Say my Steven Brust collection? Hmm, I think I am hanging onto that ad infinitum. So over the last week or so, three words came up that I needed to reference. They were;

I can relate, with both my boys being quite obstreperous on a frequent basis. It's not the kind of word one would use when admonishing such behaviour though - perhaps it could be used in an email to HR to describe a disruptive employee? Haha! That one I found in a self-help book called 4,000 Weeks. The next two came from the recently finished King short story book I mentioned in another post:

This is a useful word to know! Being a student of good English, I am aware of many words that have silent letters, for a variety of reasons. To now know that to elide consonants means to not pronounce them when speaking, is a nice little bit of learning for me.

This is also a useful word, which I can employ to describe a few people I know, without being insulting about how they approach life. 

I'm not sure if I'll continue this series or not, but I think it's pretty cool. It would actually make for a good YT Shorts series, come to think of it. Am I ever going to try to make my own vids? I am a good writer and speaker, so who knows? Mayhap I'll put it on the To Do list and give it a go sometime...

My Career - Part 10 - Kupang (2018 - 2019)

There are a number of posts in this blog that talk about my time in Kupang with Gulf. So I won't flog the dead horse too much so to speak. Plus frankly the jury is still out as to how this project is going to potentially be funded going forward. Not that my pissy musings will have any impact, but I'd hate for any comment I make to be taken the wrong way by the wrong person. So we'll be fairly broad in our descriptions shall we say? Haha, that's what I say now. When I get stuck in, well Gulf, be ready for broadsides you fuckers.

I joined Gulf on the back of 12 months out of the game, working in the family business back in Barooga. It was an opportunity almost too good to be true frankly - it scratched two itches. One, it was a residential role, and two, it was back in SE Asia, my spiritual home. I was super-pumped. I met the charismatic Hamish and the debonair John in Bali for an interview, after first shooting up to Kupang to meet the rest of the management team, largely consisting of Paul and Sam. This was a project that had been going in some way for bloody years, but due to corrupt and/or inept management and/or local government, and/or dubiously-motivated investors, it went broke and went back to Square #1 a couple of years before I got involved. Hamish was very bullish that he had, in fact, sourced the required funding, signed the deal, and we were good to fucking go. I impressed them, they impressed me, we signed on.

That saw us leaving Barooga in March 2018, farking hell that seems like aeons ago now, yet it was just seven years. Amazing how the passage of time can appear to be lengthened by the volume of experience that transpires within it. We arrived, found a place to live (not many choices really, with Emerald Park being pretty much the only secure condo in the city), got the kids in school (again, not much choice here), and I got into work. 

What we were looking to develop was manganese. Mn, as it is found in Timor, is deposited by mud volcanoes, which are undersea vents essentially. The mineral-rich fluid is erupted into the sea, and in this case, due to the content, as the component parts cooled and fell through the water, Mn nodules were formed, which were deposited on the sea bed. See below:

These are the things that lie around all over Timor, in their millions. In fact the locals have made a lucrative industry over many years, by simply picking them up, putting them in baskets, and selling them to local or Chinese traders. We had ~50 different identified deposits, although they were not easy to model and quantify, given the nature of the deposit. 

My influence in this role was to provide an overall mining plan, to get the operations off the ground. The idea was to mix traditional and mechanised methods. In doing so, we hope to keep the locals happy and engaged, as well as maximising ore recovery at a low unit cost. To facilitate this, we would mechanise mining in the guts of most deposits, and allow artisanal mining on the fringes, where high productivity would be difficult anyway. It was a good plan. What really propelled us forward though, was my discovery that over 50% of the ore in Mn deposits was actually contained in fines. This was a potential game-changer. All we had to do was figure out a way to get the fines out. Generally-speaking, this was a piece of cake. The challenge was that 95% of the Mn deposits are in under-developed areas, with little access to electricity, and virtually no access to fresh water. So we needed to figure out a way to dry-screen this stuff. We partnered with an engineering firm in Jakarta, who's name escapes me now. They came up with a few possible solutions, but it was always going to be difficult without access to water. When the mining moratorium came up, we put all development activities except building the smelter on hold, to optimise cashflow, so we never finalised this unfortunately. 

The next little snippet of mine to emerge came from discussions with my team. You see, NTT, the Indonesian state that Kupang and GMG's activities were in, is merely the western half of the island of Timor. Much like many contemporary state boundaries, this division comes not from local history, but from colonial history - the west was controlled by the Dutch prior to independence, and the east by Portugal. Plus, there was a small area in the west controlled by the Portuguese, which is now an enclave of Timor Leste, within Indonesia. The Indo's controlled TL for some time, and the path to independence for Timor Leste was a painful one. So much so that even now (then, in 2019 I mean), it is still much more under-developed than NTT, and that goes doubly for their mining industry. Geology knows no political boundaries however, and as such, the Mn deposits that are a rich part of NTT's mineral wealth, are even more so in TL. My goal was to find local partners, and look towards developing these assets with Gulf. We made bloody good progress too, but alas, things turned awry. The reason this happened was that I voiced my disquiet with the board about how we were approaching funding, what the real motives of our Indo partners were, and that we were not being all that honest with shareholders. Me raising these objections in a board meeting saw my contract being not renewed. At the time, I was already unhappy with my boss and the board, so I was pleased to find a way out. 

That's a slide from one of my numerous board presentations. If my kids are reading this in due course, and have any interest in finding out more about this or any other aspect of my work, well the archives are there. Steve and Woody had similar issues, but stuck it out, Woody in a big way, being chief financier for some time. I'd seriously consider going back if it was those two running the show, but never if Mr. H. was involved. He is a maniac.

At some point I'll likely put together a post about life in Kupang, as it was quite the experience. But for now, I'll leave these couple of snippets. I was on Instagram earlier today, and for whatever reason, looked up Lala's school in Kupang. As it happens, there are numerous posts from back in the day that she stars in! One such example can be found here - Stella Gracia School

One last aspect I want to mention about the Kupang experience is this. In Malaysia, I drove myself everywhere, as did all the expats. Yes the roads could be a bit crazy, but by and large, it was easy and safe enough to get around. In Indo however, that is frowned upon, as driving as an expat can get one into serious trouble in the event of an accident. So at Kupang, I had a driver. For a fair while is was a guy with the same name as me, but our favourite was always Pak Gerson. He was a grand chap and someone I think of fondly. The kids loved him too. That's him and me below. I hope you're going well Pak!

You Like It Darker

So today I finished my latest Stephen King book. It has been a long time between drinks. So much so, that I can't even remember the last King book I read. He has gone through phases in his career, and I must admit, I am more a fan of his earlier works. When I was a mid to late teenager, and in my 20's, I voraciously consumed everything he produced. As is my wont though, I no longer hold any of those books, having turned over my belongings on numerous occasions throughout my life. I remember living in Bentley in Perth, around 2002, and having a drug rehab' group come over, and telling them to take it all. That included furniture, kitchen ware, gold clubs, collectible toys, books, the lot. I have done this numerous times in my life. Why, I am not entirely sure. Sometimes, I need a reset I guess. I have been feeling this way of late too, hence why my eBay listings have seen somewhat of a surge. Anyway, I digress. I was inspired to write this post today because of one thing - the afterword in King's book, You Like It Darker. The book itself was ok, nothing special, although a couple of the stories had a certain spell about them. Interestingly, reading the afterword, a couple of them were penned in King's heyday, and sat in his unpublished archives until now. I wonder if that is what drew me to those tales? But it was the overall message I took from the last section of the book, and that was that to me, King was saying goodbye. Hey, he is 75yo, has been writing for well over 40 years, probably more like 50, and is clearly not needing the income!

So I was inspired to write this homage to King, to respect the influence he had on my younger years, and to recognise what it means to be able to inspect, study and perhaps even embrace one's darker side. King's writings were often "darker" and often inspired by what we, as modern western people at least, see as those things that go bump in the night, and to be feared. I loved his early novels - The Stand, Salem's Lot, It, they all stood out. What really stood out in those days though, was his short story collections. Such as Skeleton Crew and Night Shift. So much so, that once I bought this new short story collection, I decided to grab second-hand versions of the older two, to revisit them, after several decades. As with the new book, I suspect they will both go into the donation box once read, but I do relish the idea of revisiting old experiences one more time. If it's my kids reading this post, and for whatever reason, you have never picked up a Stephen King book before, I recommend you try one of his older ones. I must admit, that afterword tugged at my heartstrings for what I felt it meant, and it did give me motivation to go back and revisit some of the works that meant something to me, so much earlier in life.